I had to translate the Orange book of instructions for Pierre to Install the new LIVEBOX which will apparently give us free calls all over Europe and Australia ( must make some Australian friends... anyone got any I could ring?)( not really free as u pay for them in the subscription ) Anyhoo back to the tale.....
1) Free ( Included ) Unlimited Telephone calls to UK, Europe & Oz
2) French TV ( Oooooooh I could write plenty about that... more in future blogs... think Naked Benny Hill - Oh no that's German TV... Think deep meaningful 5 hour discutes about Food / Sex / Cooking interspersed with adverts for raw rabbit and every type of cleaning product known to man... also future blog material they DO love cleaning the French )
3) Internet - slow connection according to powerful Pierre 200 megawotnots or something per I don't know day... hour.... minute? Pete pls confirm for the technically minded who may read our blog.
ALL THIS I TELL YOU for 29 Euros per month !!!!!! We were paying about 50 before when we weren't even here.... Originally we paid 79 Euros a month plus 30 for tinternet 7 years ago.... Have you gone to fetch your noose yet... I am so bored I think I might go and try a bit of self hanging..
Anyhoo my part in this little French drama was to be on hand whilst Technoboy did his stuff with the BOX and his ORDINATEUR (PC.)
I can't even begin to articulate how horrifying this is for me.... Put me infront of 1000's of people and ask me to talk for an hour with no warning and I would be happy as Larry, ask me to set up a business selling ice to Eskimos, not a problem.... ask me to be stuck in a room with a LIVEBOX, WIRES, STUFF I DONT KNOW THE ENGLISH WORDS FOR French Instructions, Pete,
A COMPUTER or 5, and programmes that don't do what they should IN FRENCH, With Pete at the keyboard and I'm not allowed to touch it...... Ggggggrrrrrrr .... and ( shameful admission Mercury retrograde until 12 Sept... expect technical, financial, career and business delays boys and girls) and I want to start PRIMAL SCREAMING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pete is a very patient and intelligent man... he had to do it on his own.... he succeeded... I am blogging this on the INTERNET ! I have yet to make a phonecall that is in hand apparently.... THE END
Ok, you asked for this - Megawotnots in Dulciespeak, in fact translates in our case to 2 Mbps - Megabits per second....
ReplyDelete'A megabit (mb) actually has two different values depending on what the term is being used to describe. When used to describe data storage, a megabit (mb) is the equivalent of 220 or 1,048,576 bits. However, when used to describe data transfer rates, one mb equals 1,000,000 bits. Therefore:
1 mbps (megabit per second) = 1,000,000 bits per second
In addition to the confusion over the value of a megabit (mb), there is also confusion between the megabit (mb) and the megabyte (MB). As noted earlier one byte (B) is comprised of 8 bits (b). So, one megabyte (MB), when used to describe data storage equals 220 or 1,048,576 bytes. When used to explain data transfer rates, one megabyte (MB) is 1,000,000 bytes (B), or 8,000,000 bits (b). Therefore:
1 MBps (megabyte per second) = 8 mbps (megabits per second)
Some equivalents worthy of note related to the equation directly above: megabytes per second can be expressed as MBps as well as MB/sec. Additionally, 1 MBps and 8 mbps can also be represented as 8 million bits per second or 1 million bytes per second.
Networking technologies are commonly rated in mbps. This includes home power-line networks, phone-line networks, wireless models and commercial or public networks like the Internet. Connectivity to the Internet by companies that sell DSL service often advertise data transfer speeds in terms of mbps, though some also use a (kilobits per second). Wireless firewall routers and NICs (Network Interface Cards) are just two of the many hardware devices generally rated in mbps...'
Yes, what fun was had indeed - I got my poor PC's mixed up by switching their USB sticks around - USB sure can be weird little critters! Just got my laptop to sort out now...zzzzzzzzzzzz
ReplyDeleteOMG how did we ever end up together? I am just going to have to scream into a pillow now........ for about 5 hours....
ReplyDelete